Monday, January 28, 2013

Peer Pressure

Now we all know the peer pressure will happen to us all the way through adulthood but the time it seems to affect us the most is when we are tweens and teenagers. You hear stories all the time through social news about children who were harassed by their peers and what sort of tragedy it may have caused. Most of the time I either will scroll through these stories or just pass them by without even taking a glance at them. I know I should have more interest in these sort of things especially since I am a mother of a 3 year old boy but I guess because of the fact that they are not happening right in front of me physically I don't feel like there is anything I can do about them anyways so why worry myself with it.  Recently I have been able to step back and think about how I view and feel about adolescent peer pressure. I live in a small military community where word travels so fast I barely have time to read about anything on our community spouse page before there is already 30 comments. The other day at the main park a mother witnessed a few teenage boys and one teenage girl hanging out on a park bench. She said that what she saw next was shocking to her. The boys where trying to get the girl to kiss one of them and film it with their cell phones and she said that the girl kept saying no but they wouldn't quit with bugging her about it. Now with in the first few comments on this thread the spouses were upset and how something had to be done about this. Some even asked why she didn't call the police for our community.  I was left reading this with mixed feelings. One half of me said "Who cares? This is just typical teenage behavior. Its not like they were being violent or destructive or even drug and alcohol" and the other side of me said "I'm a mother now why isn't this bugging me like it should. I do care for the girl's well being but why do I not feel like I should be in mommy protective mode?"  This is something that has been bothering me for a few days. It is like I lack the capability to give a crap sometimes.  Now I do know that if this was my child I probably would be acting a whole lot different and when I look at it that way my brain begins to make sense as of why my parents didn't allow me to hang out with guys by myself and that I always had to have a girlfriend of mine with me. I didn't always follow the rules of my parents and did the whole one girl hanging out with several guys but these guys as stupid as they would act never in any way to harm me whether physically or through extreme emotion. This could also be why I don't feel like she was in harms way. Kids do dumb things and since she didn't give into peer pressure and kept to her "no" it makes me feel like she was going to be fine and that she was smart enough to get out of there if things began to make a turn for the worse. The biggest step to fighting the pressure is saying "No" and sticking to it. Who knows though, once I have a daughter of my own maybe just maybe I will become just like these crazy protective spouses here to kids that are not my own.